NoPasaNada

A Poliogue Poll

Actually it’s a pretty simple survey as opposed to a ‘poll’ but I like the way ‘Poliogue Poll’ sounds. That said, this site is about to go through some changes. You guys? My site is about to become a woman. Anyway, poll, survey, whatever you want to call it, I would be very appreciative if you could take a few minutes to fill it out. Pretty please?

Thanks!

HB

P.S. If you have trouble viewing you can also fill out the survey/form/thingamajig here: Poliogue Survey 2012

P.P.S. You look nice today.

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Build Your Perfect President

The 2012 election will be the first election where I have been a fully formed adult – relatively speaking – during the incumbents’ presidency thus giving me the ability to really think of what we have now versus what we could be in the future. In 2004 during Bush v. Kerry, it was Kerry who employed me and kept me clothed in Banana Republic for six months so when it came time to cast my (absentee) ballot I chose Kerry even though I felt no real connection to him or his policies. Do I regret that now? No. I only wish that I had been more thoughtful at the time as opposed to voting for the candidate everyone else was voting for and without question. Always ask questions. That should be a given but it isn’t. Also necessary for any voter is a prolonged look at the person currently residing in the White House. Never mind that you’ve straight down the ballot for the Democrat. Have you ever sat down and thought about why?

I ask because I have a little secret for you: There is no perfect candidate. There is no perfect President.

You won’t find him (hopefully one day *her*) in this election or the next. To think that there should be a President with whom you can agree on every topic is not only naive but it also goes against the basic tenets of democracy. There should always be something the leadership is doing that pisses you off, gets you fired up, and makes you want to voice the need for one change or another. I’d much prefer to say that though I choose Barack Obama as my candidate for 2012 that there are things about his policies with which I disagree. Hell, there have been moments of anger but it is my belief that having any of the Republican contenders in office would be detrimental to the country and our relationships around the world.

I keep running into angry conservatives because of the choices they have been given during this primary. It seems that there is nothing that pleases them: Mitt Romney is a RINO and don’t forget about “RomneyCare”. Sure Santorum is a social conservative but the former Senator is also a “big Government” conservative and there is nothing they dislike more than the already bloated bureaucracy. And one cannot be a “real” conservative if they aren’t willing to board the “let’s get rid of the Department of Education” bandwagon. Despite Santorum’s wins in Colorado, Minnesota and Missouri on Tuesday evening, many are left to wonder whether or not he has the infrastructure to campaign seriously all the way to the convention in August. Newt Gingrich is fun to think about but this is a serious Presidential race, correct? With Paul we are privy to the thought that Civil Rights is a ‘mistake’ and severely isolationist foreign policy. While he could play to the ultra-right his ability to be elected leaves much to be desired. He’s like your crazy uncle who gets invited to Thanksgiving: you nod and smile but you run away as quickly as possible. Huntsman worked for Obama, Tim Pawlenty couldn’t handle it and Perry turned out to be a dud. I picture Conservatives walking around aimlessly until the contest arrives to their state then just closing their eyes and placing a finger on someone…anyone. I wonder what it is that Republicans are looking for and who would be their idea of a good, quality candidate.

Then there is the President. When the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act was passed, there was a thrill in the air. He did what he could to keep people working and the same goes for the Education Jobs Fund. Then came the events in Wisconsin and Ohio last spring where his leadership left much to be desired when it came to the union workers who helped to get him to the White House in the first place. That said having a ‘Right to Work’ proponent in office would send me screaming for the hills. I’ve often wish that he could be stronger and take a harder line on issues instead of just sitting on the sidelines. Taking issue with his leadership came up again during the work of the SuperCommittee. I know that it was technically congress’ responsibility but a little nudge to work harder and better would have been far more helpful than a match with Eric Cantor and John Boehner. My point is that this President isn’t perfect and I never expected for him to be. He was voted to bring hope and change. Not hope, change and being infallible.

It’s not just the angry Conservatives but the annoyed Progressives that cause me to scratch my head. For the latter I wonder what exactly they were expecting? For Barack Obama to enter the West Wing, snap his fingers and suddenly everyone has free healthcare and a job? Did we not expect change to take years and realize that it was the hope that it can one day happen? It is to both Tea Partiers and Liberals, Republicans and Democrats that ask: What do you want in a President? Is there a ‘perfect’ choice?

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Moving on from Komen

I’ve struggled on where to start but the beginning is always best. That would be three years ago when my aunt – my mother’s sister – died after a years long fight against breast cancer. Whether or not it was metastatic are details of which I remain unaware but I do know that she was only 41 and that 41 is an incredibly young age for someone to die. I don’t know whether or not she was accepting of what might happen or how my mother really dealt with her death given that my grandmother – my mother’s mother – died exactly five weeks prior. I do know that from time to time I see my aunt’s dearest friend in the world around Albany and we speak. Briefly. And each time it kills me inside. A knot forms at the pit of my stomach and the second I am alone my eyes fill with tears and the sorrow that accompanies the wonder of how those left behind deal. I’ve kept from my family how I have dealt with Judy’s death because though expected it felt so sudden. I was leaving a friend’s home in Napa Valley when my mother called to say that she passed and I didn’t cry. That I remember. I drove to San Francisco, went out for drinks and dessert and spent the entire night in a guest bedroom awake. Not crying but thinking. She didn’t deserve this…any of it. She was incredibly sweet, kind and faithful and in times of anger I question the fairness of it all. But life isn’t fair, which is true but that hasn’t kept me from keeping gifts given to me by Judy that I glance at and wonder why.

At the time of Judy’s death my knowledge of breast cancer was fairly limited and I cannot say that all these years later I am any wiser. I knew that it could be a fast killer and that in some cases there is a genetic factor. I also knew that early detection of the cancer can give patients a higher survival rate. Of course during the month of October there were marches and runs and every store I entered proudly displayed pink products on behalf of breast cancer research but I am amazed at how little thought I gave to any of this. I purchased items because it was a good cause. Because I was doing something and contributing to breast cancer research. I contributed and bought Yoplait containers with pink tops because it felt like the right thing. Ignorance is bliss, my friends and no one told me otherwise.

Even when finally faced with breast cancer and to watch what it does to a person and a family, I felt even more empowered that years of pink crap was doing something for the overall good. Giving to the Susan G. Komen foundation would lead to prevention and a cure, I thought. They were doing good work. I type these words now while shaking my head. Feeling duped. How could I be so stupid? How could I believe that “pink washing” buckets of Kentucky Fried Chicken would lead to a cure? How could I be so stupid to believe that an organization whose mission is to educate and inform the public on breast cancer would not fall into the political fray. This is what I wonder now. There was a fantastic interview after the Komen foundation pulled its funding from Planned Parenthood with Andrea Mitchell and Komen founder, former Ambassador Nancy Brinker. The way that Andrea – recently diagnosed with breast cancer – keeps pushing and digging at Ambassador Brinker with questions of why Komen changed their grant process, why underinsured or uninsured women shouldn’t be allowed to have their services and potentially life-saving early detection; there’s this urging and pain coming off of Andrea Mitchell. Not that she’s just pissed but that so many people believed in the Komen foundation and now that trust is gone.

There is something about death and the grieving process where we feel the need to do something, try harder and do better. When Judy died I wanted to go all in and at the time the Komen foundation was what I knew. Now I know different. Thank God. I will not give to them anymore not just because of this ‘scandal’ but because to honor those that have died from this terrible disease would not be to give blindly but to learn more. It’s not about covering shit in pink it’s about continuing the education and assisting groups and organizations that give more than lip service to the detection, prevention and the cure. I cannot end this without stating that it doesn’t make me a socialist to think that all women (and men), no matter their financial situation, should have the right to mammograms and early detection. It makes me human.

***

The wonderful, beautiful and amazing Susan Niebur passed away yesterday after a five year battle with inflammatory breast cancer. A rare and aggressive form of the disease. In lieu of flowers her family has asked for donations to the Inflammatory Breast Cancer Research Foundation. Please consider giving.

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By defunding Planned Parenthood the Susan G. Komen foundation betrays women

What breast cancer has taught me

Social Media Acts as a Catalyst for Policy Change

National Breast Cancer Foundation

the American Cancer Society

Avon Walk for the Cure

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Posted in Being a Woman, Opinion - theirs and mine | Leave a comment